The Mindset of a Healthy Relationship with a Filipina: Principles that have Immensely Helped me to take my Relationship with a Filipina to a Higher Level

I spent the first few years of my relationship “uselessly groping for a bridge” and staring at the question raised by the “Culture Shock Philippines” book: “when the queasy feeling of…groping for a bridge…begins to make my tremble…what do I do?”.

I spent 11 long years trying to find out and, eventually, managed to come up with a philosophy, which I encapsulated into a set of principles, that I’ll be sharing with you in the days to come.

In short, the principles I have outlined and that, in my opinion, are the backbone of a healthy mixed-relationship, are the following:

  1. when the challenges of culture-shock show up TURN FRUSTRATION INTO CHILDLIKE CURIOSITY
  2. don’t enter a mixed-relationship with a set of expectations and don’t manipulate your Filipino partner to fit into your expectations
  3.  choose to be in love rather than right even when you find it extremely difficult to understand certain aspects of the Filipino culture
  4.  although learning about the Filipino culture and doing so with childlike curiosity is necessary, learning about principles and strategies that work CROSS-CULTURALLY will speed up the process of building a bridge
  5. the “real” bridge is an “emotional” one rather than a “cultural” one

These principles have immensely helped me and can spare you from years of “uselessly groping for a bridge”.

Anyway I’ll be discussing them in more detail in the coming posts.

Until next time

Eduardo

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